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Tuesday, April 8, 2003

Head 2 Head: Three's Company Landlords
Here's how Head 2 Head works: I throw out a debate between two people, places or things, and you settle it by posting a comment.

Today's question: Who ruled Santa Monica real estate better: the team of Stanley and Helen Roper or the swingin' single, Ralph Furley?

Stanley and Helen Roper: The Beast and the Beast
Pros: A double-dose of fixed-income hilarity. Stanley might have been Roper the Moper for 29 minutes of each show, but he was always good for a dry one-liner at the end. Helen, meanwhile, was the funniest woman on the show, which is like being the best music teacher at a school for the deaf. Classic Mr. Roper episode: "Stanley Casanova," in which Mr. Roper mistakenly thought he was a ladies man in Larry's league.
Cons: Roper? I hardly know her. And thank goodness, judging from that tacky wardrobe and clunky jewelry. Anyone else get squeamish when the Ropers made up and kissed at the end of one of their many misunderstandings (typically caused by misinterpreting something heard from the other side of the kitchen's swinging door)? Also, major points taken off for that damn parakeet.

Ralph Furley: People's Least Sexiest
Pros: Went by his tougher yet more suave alter-ego, "R.F." when standing up to his domineering older brother Bart, or when saddling up to the made-of-construction-paper-and-Elmer's-glue bar at the Regal Beagle. We're going pro on the snort, which usually came at the end of a zinger that painted Jack as a guy who dances with his hands above his head. The joke, of course, was always on Furley, since Jack was really a bisexual. And those suits! Major bonus points. Classic Mr. Furley episode: "Ralph's Rival" in which R.F. pretended to be an oil baron to impress an old mate of equally pathetic proportions.
Cons: Furley was such a pussy, The French army hired him to give motivational speeches. Also made like a born-again Christian and never had sex. And he wasn't even religious.

Three's Company Links:

Episode Guide | Jump the Shark Page | John Ritter Appreciation | Yahoo! Group: Jack Off to Joyce DeWitt

Category: Head 2 Head | Permalink | Post a Comment (7)


Comments: Head 2 Head: Three's Company Landlords

The host's choice: Furley. I loved Mr. Roper, too, but he had a lot of baggage, and her name was Helen.

Plus, the Furley era had Jack's Bistro and more chest hair on Larry.

Posted by Paul Katcher at April 8, 2003 11:01 PM

If you're tracing television ancestry, Roper's lineage would clearly go directly to Jack Benny. No one deadpanned like Norman Fell, except Benny.

Tracing Furley's forefathers is a tad more touchy. He's got a little of Paul Lynde in him, but damn if Knotts isn't a jiggling, turkey necked clone of Dr. Smith from "Lost in Space: during his best wig-out moments.

Posted by Jeff at April 9, 2003 11:08 AM

ok i liked the ropers.
helen was funny in her day!
always wanting to hump stanley
hubbahubba

Posted by tracy at April 9, 2003 4:33 PM

Stanley hands down. RF was ambiguous at best about his sexual proclivities. At least Roper was married to a woman; albeit a beast of a woman with a tacky Maude wardrobe, but a woman nonetheless.

Stanley was wicked funny in a George Jefferson sort of way especially with the interplay between he and Helen who symbolizes George's Weezie. Furley was just a wormy, whiny pathetic little loser who in today's world would be asking whether that is a 3 or 5 day rental of that copy of "Shampoo" that is in every Blockbuster.

Stanley was the man!

Posted by JC at April 9, 2003 6:04 PM

Stanley and Helen, no contest. Helen was the female version of Jack -- self-assured and always on the prowl. Her sexual confidence scared the crap out of her husband, for pete's sake. You gotta love the [post?] middle-aged woman who still believes she's sexy and wants to get laid.

Helen rules.

Posted by bhw at April 10, 2003 12:12 AM

It's really all about Mr. Furley's leisure suits. 'Nuff said.

Posted by Jon at April 10, 2003 5:48 AM

Tough one. Each had their highs and lows on the show. While R.F. never got any, at least he wanted some. While Helen was confident and self-assured, she was quite annoying, and anything but sexy--she definitely takes points away from that team. When you take into consideration the broader career of each (impossible not to be prejudiced by that), You've gotta go with Furley--in 10 rounds.

Posted by Marty at April 10, 2003 2:42 PM
Post a comment
















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